If you are going to succeed in life, you have to learn life's most important lessons. Here are life lessons that you should learn early on in life:
Embracing Inclusivity
How Cricket Transformed My Life and Taught Me the Power of Unity
During my teenage years, I found myself frequently causing trouble. My academic performance at school was lackluster, and I often ended up in conflicts on the playground.
One particular incident stands out vividly in my memory: the day I was banned from my colony cricket team. Although the exact reason eludes me now, the feeling of exclusion remains etched in my mind.
Witnessing my peers enjoy the game while I sat on the sidelines filled me with a profound sense of sadness.
Raised by a mother who was a government school teacher, I grew up under her watchful eye. Her strict demeanor earned her respect from many students, while instilling fear in others.
Among her pupils was a boy from our neighborhood—a short, thin lad with a remarkably fair complexion. Fondly nicknamed "Haddi" due to his appearance, he pedaled his oversized bicycle past our colony one day.
"Where are you headed?" I called out to him.
"To the ground, to play cricket," he replied.
Despite my mother's warnings against venturing too far from home, especially to the abandoned school playground near our colony, I felt an unexpected urge to join him.
Growing up in Bihar, a region notorious for its history of kidnappings and violence, my mother's protective instincts were understandably heightened. Yet, on that fateful day, I chose to defy her wishes and followed Haddi to the cricket ground.
What awaited me was nothing short of transformative. As I stepped onto the lush green field, surrounded by the azure sky and rustling trees, I found myself swept up in the enchanting world of cricket.
Haddi introduced me to a man known simply as "Golden." With a hopeful heart, I asked if I could join their team. Without hesitation, Golden Bhaiya welcomed me with open arms, offering me a fresh start and a newfound sense of belonging.
Adapting to playing alongside adults proved challenging. I faced setbacks—bowled out on the first delivery, hit for sixes while bowling, and dropping catches while fielding. Yet, fueled by my love for the game, I persisted.
Despite our humble beginnings, Golden Bhaiya's mantra of inclusivity—"Anyone can join our team"—transformed our team.
Soon, players of all backgrounds, religions, and physical attributes flocked to join our ranks. Our collective goal transcended mere victory; it centered on the joy of playing together.
In the end, it was not the pursuit of trophies that defined us, but rather the spirit of camaraderie and unity that bound us as one. Through cricket, we learned to celebrate our differences and embrace the richness of diversity, paving the way for a brighter, more inclusive future.
Life Lesson:
Gratitude overflowed within me as I reflected on the opportunity to play cricket alongside a diverse team. Golden Bhaiya's inclusive demeanor imparted invaluable lessons on unity and acceptance, shaping our collective experience. With each new member, our bond deepened, fostering a camaraderie that transcended boundaries. Together, we shared laughter, celebrated victories, and stood resilient through defeats. The cricket ground became more than just a field; it transformed into a sanctuary where differences were honored, and our shared love for the game bound us together.
Applying the essence of gratitude and unity in daily life begins with acknowledging and appreciating the diverse perspectives and talents of those around us. Embracing inclusivity entails welcoming individuals from all walks of life and nurturing a sense of belonging within our communities. By celebrating both individual and collective achievements, we create a culture of support and encouragement, where challenges are faced together and successes are shared joyously. Through fostering an environment of togetherness and acceptance, we pave the way for a brighter future where differences are not only embraced but celebrated, and where collective aspirations are pursued with unwavering passion and unity.
Embracing Inner Strength
Navigating Through Tough Times
The bright sun was streaming in through the windows, casting a warm glow throughout the room. It was the 29th of December, and while the rest of the world was preparing for a New Year, a new chapter was already unfolding in my life.
As I turned the doorknob, a sense of unease crept over me. When I stepped inside, the sight before me was chilling - blood was splattered all over the walls, floor, and bed.
I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself as my mind raced to make sense of what had happened. It was a scene straight out of a thriller series on Netflix - a gruesome, disturbing sight that marked the beginning of yet another restart in my life.
36 Hours Before
My wife, Shafaque, was having trouble sleeping. She was experiencing a series of intense pains. When I asked if we should call the doctor, she insisted that it was already midnight and that the doctor was probably sleeping.
However, as the night progressed, the pain intensified and became more frequent. We stayed up all night unable to sleep, until something unexpected happened.
"Salis, my water broke!" she shouted.
"What should I do?" I asked her.
"Call the ambulance."
I quickly unlocked my phone and searched for the hospital's number. The phone rang several times, but no one answered. Finally, someone picked up.
"Please send an ambulance as fast as possible," I pleaded.
"Can you please share your address?" they asked.
I shared our address as quickly as I could and disconnected the call, relieved to know that help was on the way.
Shafaque requested me to contact the doctor. I dialled the number and handed the phone to her.
"Hello doctor, my water broke!"
"Reach the hospital asap. I am sending an ambulance."
She was in excruciating pain and unable to comprehend the doctor's words, so she handed me the phone.
First, the doctor instructed me to calm down, then began to explain. But before I could fully understand what was happening, Shafaque let out another scream.
"Salis. The head is out."
"The head is out. Shafaque is in pain.", I said to the doctor.
Shafaque screamed again!
"Come fast. I think the baby is coming out."
I ended the call and rushed to the bathroom. In seconds, I held my baby in my arms. She was covered in blood but still looked beautiful. I smiled with relief.
"Congratulations! Sahar Salis is here."
Shafaque managed to hold our newborn daughter while sitting on the bed. I called the doctor again.
"Doctor, the baby has been delivered," I said urgently.
"Congratulations! The ambulance should be arriving soon. Please take good care of Shafaque," the doctor replied.
Just minutes later, the sound of the ambulance could be heard outside. I quickly made my way to the door, where the driver was waiting.
He asked me where the patient was, and I led him to the bedroom where Shafaque was cradling our newborn daughter in her arms.
The urgency of the situation was clear, and the driver quickly called the hospital to request a nurse to assist with the process.
Within a few minutes, a second ambulance arrived, and a nurse instructed me to help her with the process of transporting Shafaque and the baby to the hospital as quickly as possible for a full checkup.
Our humble abode was situated on the second floor of a rundown apartment building that had been standing for half a century.
Unfortunately, the building was not equipped with elevators and even the balconies were in a state of disrepair. Despite these challenges, with the help of a dedicated nurse, Shafaque summoned all her strength and managed to make her way down the flight of stairs and eventually reached the waiting ambulance.
We then sat in the ambulance and arrived at the hospital. Upon entering the emergency ward, the nurse's first question was, "Where is your family?" To which we replied, "No one came."
Life Lesson
In life there will be times when you need someone. Someone who can just hold your hand tight when you feel like falling. In these moments, we tend to ask help from our family & friends.
But, what happens when they don't show up? We fall down even further into depression. This is exactly the moment to tell yourself, "If no one can help me, I will help myself".
In these challenging times, we must learn to rely on our inner strength and resilience. By believing in ourselves and taking proactive steps towards our well-being, we can overcome any obstacles that come our way.
Cultivating self-reliance and self-care practices can help us navigate through tough situations with grace and determination.
Remember, you are stronger than you think, and you have the power within you to rise above adversity. Trust in your abilities and keep moving forward with courage.
Suicide is not a solution
Blue liquid coming out from my mouth, resting on the place where my mother died, staring at the white ceiling, I wonder how my life turned upside down in a matter of few years.
Yes! I did it. I tried to kill myself. I tried to escape the challenges life threw at me. I talked myself into believing that I was incapable of winning my battles. And there I was, failing to kill myself once and for all.
Everyone moved on. Her students got a new teacher, her husband got a new wife, her daughters got a new mother, and there I was floating, lonely in an endless blue pool, trying to find that missing piece: my mother.
In my quest to find my mother, I didn't realize that I got lost.
Lost in a dark space where no one can see me, hear me, feel me, help me.
Why did I do it?
I felt lonely. That's the answer. Even with people around me, I felt lonely. My existence looked meaningless and all I could feel was sadness.
What did I do next?
I started searching. No! Not my mother, but myself. One step at a time, I moved towards an unexplored road. One that led me to where I am today.
I have not reached my destination yet, but I love the unpredictability of my journey. I still feel sad, I still get lonely, but in the end, it was my decision. That's what keeps me going.
Life Lesson: When you feel like your time has come to an end, P A U S E for a moment. Pausing gives your brain a buffer space to think of a possible solution.
If it doesn't help, reach out to someone and share your feelings. It can be anyone. Share it with a bunch of strangers and ask for opinion.
Try to search about your struggles online, and find if others experienced the same things that you're experiencing now.
There are many helpline numbers that you can call. Take action, but towards a solution, and never give up.
Not pausing, and not asking for help, were my mistakes. Learn from my mistakes, and try to find a solution to your problem.
There are a million solutions out there, you just have to find them. I found it, you can too!
If you don't know whom to talk to, you can connect with me on my Instagram - @salisafaque. I might not reply instantly, but I will reply 100%.
Life is Short
Morning sunlight peaking through the open window lit up our bedroom to a bright start. I was lost in my dream when my father woke me up. Just like a daily habit, I looked at the golden circle wall clock. It was 6 am. Time for school.
Before I could begin my morning pre-school routine, my father said something that woke me up stronger than a doppio would.
"Your mother is feeling unwell. Keep an eye on her while I call the doctor."
I rushed to the living room and saw my mother sitting on the sofa. She was holding herself tightly as if someone was sucking her soul out of her body.
Like a broken radio, she was repeating the same line again and again.
"Please, Allah, forgive me for all the things I did wrong in my life. I am going to die."
Her whitish skin looked pale. She was lost in her battle with no sense of the world around her.
Looking at her state, I rushed to call the aunty who lived downstairs. Skipping the stairs as fast as I could, I reached the ground floor and started knocking on the door.
Surprised by the sudden door knocks this early in the morning, Aunty peeked out of the window. As soon as our eyes met, I said:
"Mummy is unwell. Please come with me."
Looking at the urgency she opened the door and without any second thought followed me upstairs. She saw my mother crying in pain and tried to console my mother. She helped her to lie down on the bed.
As soon as my mother's head touched the pillow, her body lost its color and she was gone.
Lost in an infinite dream, she lay on the bed while I wiped her dry lips with my favorite handkerchief. I looked at the wall clock, it said "6:15 am".
My life changed forever in just 15 minutes.
Life Lesson: Instead of spending time on things that you don't love doing, do what you love. Instead of spending time on people who don't care about you, spend time on people who do care. Instead of spending time writing that long hate comment which will eventually get you blocked on Instagram, leave a positive one on someone's post whom you care about. Let's use the time we have to feel good, instead of chasing numbers.